How to Behave on Social Media During a Divorce

Nowadays, most people cannot imagine
their life without social media. More than 2.77 billion users of social
networks, forums, and blogs make up about 40% of the world’s population. On
average, social media takes up around 30% of the overall time spent online.
While there’s nothing wrong with having a Facebook or Twitter account, the
information in them can be used against their owner.

Can Social Media Affect the
Divorce Outcome?

Judicial practice these days takes into
account changes in the information world and uses them to its advantage. For
example, in divorce proceedings, judges have begun to accept evidence in the
form of screenshots from social accounts, recordings of conversations from
instant messengers, and comments on various websites. As reported by CompleteCase.com,
24% of marriages ended last year because of infidelity, and 27% of spouses
found out about the affair by reading their partner’s online messages.

At the moment, social networks are essentially
a massive database with a wide variety of information about hundreds of
millions of people worldwide. It is an inexhaustible source of personal
information about its users. It means that our profiles, messages, and emails
are very much accessible to other people. Therefore, when starting a divorce
process, you need to carefully control all your activities on the Internet and
make the most of it for your benefit. All you need is to follow a few
fundamental rules while on social media to contribute to your divorce’s desired
outcome.

How you can benefit from social
media

Social media, such as Twitter, Facebook,
Snapchat, and many others, are colossal storage of valuable information. It can
be used in many various ways, including enhancing your chances of obtaining the
post-divorce terms you want. Below we offer several options on benefiting from
combining activities on social media and divorce proceedings.

Use lawfully obtained
information.

Comments, posts, photos, and videos that
your spouse shares on social networks seem inconsistent at first glance, but
they carry valuable information that may be used for your benefit. We are not
suggesting watching your spouse’s every move and looking for skeletons in the
closet. Use only publicly available information, such as Twitter posts,
comments on Reddit, or videos on YouTube. For example, show the judge a photo
from Instagram with your spouse’s unworthy behavior or screenshots of offensive
statements addressed to you.

But be careful. Remember that you cannot
use your spouse’s password to log into their account and gather the information
you need. The illegally obtained information is not admissible in courts and
may get you in trouble since it’s basically hacking, which is against the
federal law.

Be careful with your
communication style.

Good manners and common sense are very
relevant when communicating on social media. Be honest, considerate, and polite.
Your active use of social media during a divorce should become an instrument of
building your positive image. If you post something online during your divorce
proceedings, choose only positive and truthful information. Use a neutral tone
in all your messages and comments, and refrain from direct insults towards your
spouse. The court can interpret harsh criticism and offensive statements as a
tendency to aggression.

Remember that even if you delete your
comments and posts right after their publication, they still can emerge at the
most inopportune moment, for nothing disappears without a trace on the
Internet. After all, someone might have taken a screenshot of your post before
you deleted it. When it comes to correspondence with your spouse, be as polite
as possible and don’t let your feelings get the better of your common sense.

Make sure your data is secured.

With the advent of the digital age,
keeping things secret is becoming increasingly difficult. And even if you have
absolutely nothing to hide, you still have to protect the privacy of your data.
Any information can be taken out of context and misinterpreted. Therefore,
minimize access to it during the divorce proceedings as much as possible.

First of all, change your passwords to
social network accounts and make them private, especially if your ex-spouse has
access to any of them. Ask friends and family not to post information about you
online. And don’t add new friends on Facebook or Instagram, especially if you
are not very familiar with them. One may be a fake account from which your
spouse, friends, or even a private investigator will monitor you to collect the
necessary information to use in court. If you have to send confidential
information to someone, make sure it won’t fall into the wrong hands.

How to prevent social media harm
on your divorce case

A useful rule to remember is that it is
almost impossible to hide something once you’ve downloaded it on social media.
During a divorce, you need to behave to not provide your soon-to-be ex-spouse and
their lawyer with anything that they can use against you during the trial. Your
activity on social media can harm you in several circumstances that we discuss
below.

If you expect
to receive financial support after divorce

In
a divorce, financial support may be granted to one spouse from another if there
is a clear need for it. Several factors are considered in the process, and it
is not that straightforward in reality. That’s why it’s paramount to be careful
with what you share and discuss with other people. If you’ve recently started a
divorce and social media is your second home, at least try to sit tight for a
while until everything is over.

The
first mistake people make is bragging about purchases on their social network
pages. For instance, they discuss and post photos of their trip to an expensive
restaurant. This information will come in handy to the ex-spouse’s lawyer, who
can use it to reduce your financial support claims significantly. And vice
versa, if you discovered that your spouse had started a profitable business or
bought a stake in a company, you could provide evidence in court and request
more alimony.

If you want to
win a custody battle

Divorce of a married couple with minor
children always raises a rather painful question – which parent gets the
children after separation. If spouses do not conclude an amicable agreement
about child custody, it is up to a judge to determine the kids’ custodial
parent.

Your life on social media may seriously
damage your chances to obtain child custody. For example, it is better to
refrain from sharing photos from parties and corporate events with alcoholic
beverages in the frame. They may give your spouse’s lawyer a chance to suggest
you are unfit to be a primary custodial parent. As a result, the judge may
award child custody to your ex-spouse because the primary consideration they
use in this process is to act in the best interest of a minor child.

If you want to improve your chances of
winning the custody battle, it would be a good idea to show on social media
that you are a loving and responsible parent that frequently spends quality
time with your child. Upload videos from your child’s school holidays or sports
events that you attend regularly. Your joint photos from the amusement park or
from visiting children’s performances will be a great addition. The child’s
happy smiling face next to you might persuade the judge to rule in your favor.

If you have a new relationship
during the divorce process

Filing for divorce does not mean that you
are free to do whatever you want. It primarily concerns the situation when you
have a new romantic relationship. Technically, you are still married, so your
spouse may accuse you of cheating. As a general rule, lawyers do not recommend
dating until the client receives a divorce decree.

In the meantime, if you still don’t feel
like waiting that long, at least try to keep your new relationship low-key on
social networks. Don’t post photos together with your date and convince them to
do the same. Ask your friends not to tag you in their photos. Don’t leave
romantic comments on your new friend’s page. In other words, reduce your social
media activities to a minimum. Don’t give your spouse any information they can
use against you.

Conclusion

Social media can serve as a place for
self-expression and relaxation, a source of positive emotions and useful
experience. Nobody says that during a divorce, you need to give up the
privileges of the media space. Just be careful about your actions and
contemplate all consequences they might have on your post-divorce welfare.